There are moments in our lives where everything just stops.  The world around us keeps spinning but our singular world stops moving and stays completely still.  Sometimes this time is filled with calm and peace, other times it is filled with chaos and uncertainty.  There are those times when we can sail through major life events and big issues.  While other times, taking a breath seems impossible and putting one foot in front of the other seems worthless.  The clock, the setting sun, the tomorrows are all going to come but time can be so unpredictable.  

There are times, probably more than I would like to admit, when I question my strengths.  There are days that I sit down to write and wonder who would read this, I question if I should even write.  There are days I stand in front of a class or a private client and wonder why people are here, am I even good enough as a trainer.  And I regularly think this with parenting, I question decisions I make.  I feel guilty that I can’t always do more for the minis.  On the other hand, I get frustrated that I do too much for them.   These are the questions that pop into my thoughts, maybe not daily but often enough.  The only person that can answer these questions, the only person that can shut that shit up, is me. 

I have been thinking a lot about female strength lately.  I’ve been thinking about the excuses females give for having physical strength.  Sometimes the personal insults are based on what they think others can do and sometimes it is based on what they think or wish they could do.  Most of my athletes are female and I when I look around the studio I am gifted with the sight of strength in all shapes and sizes, in all genders and ages.  

It is the middle of May and for most people who started the year out with grand plans of finally getting their nutrition under control, it probably fell by the wayside sometime ago.  As the winter months wore on, the motivation to say on track probably fell away into the dark days and rain soaked months.  Now the sun is out and the bulky clothes of winter are slowly being replaced with sleeveless shirts and short shorts.  It’s almost bikini season ladies and gentlemen.  Lets get those itty bitty’s out and get ready for some northwest summer days.  

You walk into the studio with your workout wear on, your water bottle in hand and hopefully an attitude to put up with me and my music.  This might be the place you’ve called home for the past five years, or you might still be trying to figure out how to read my handwriting on the wall.  Making your way down to the studio may have been an easy decision, and confidence carried you through the door.  Or you may have struggled to get out of your car and every muscle in your body was convincing you to go back home.  Finding the right class and the right fit is hard.  It can be discouraging and humbling, it can be frustrating and embarrassing.  But it can also be rewarding and fulfilling.  Finding your inner reasons to show up and work hard is the key to your fitness success.  

At first I was trying to write this with the general population in mind.  I was thinking about how the weekends pull us off track.  How our weekends lead us down the path of temptations and overindulgences.  The more I wrote, the worse my writing sounded.  I actually have no idea if anyone else struggles with their weekends.  Maybe your weekends lead you the relaxation and recharge that you so badly need.  Maybe your weekends give you time to meal prep and schedule for the upcoming week.  Maybe your weekends are spent in your pajamas drinking coffee and doing anything you please.  Not me, my weekends are leaving me exhausted.  They are leaving me off track and with the feeling that I am treading water in most things life.  

Some days I sit at my computer trying to figure out the most important things to write about.  Sometimes it comes easy and other times I struggle to put words in front of me.  Today I am not struggling with what to say, I am struggling with how to say it.  I keep thinking about how consistency is what really matters.  How sticking with something for the long haul is so hard to accomplish that most people give up before they have reached six months.  I am trying to say that life is what it is and if we want to set goals that are achievable we have to first believe that we can do it and then put one foot in front of the other to accomplish them.  

It seems like lately social media is filled with success stories.  People who are wearing their sports bras and short shorts showing off their new bodies, their new lives.  It is littered with the flashy side of their success and a lot of times leaves out the darker side of hard work.  These stories are meant to motivate people to change their eating habits or fitness routines.  But a lot of times, these stories do the opposite.  They can make people feel like the hard work they are putting in at the gym isn’t enough, or the cake they ate over the weekend is a failure, or a night out with friends shouldn’t have happened.  Taking out others successes, what drives YOU?  What makes you the happiest version of yourself?  How do you tap into your own success and strengths to make the changes that will last?  I wish I had the answers.  My biggest starting point is to not compare yourself to others.  Look in the mirror and own the person looking back at you.  

Life is really hard sometimes.  I have written a bit this year about some of my own struggles but today is not so much about me, and yet it is all about me.  We all have hard times and for some, the hard times keep rolling in without much of a break.  As a coach I get a glimpse at some of these times.  I get conversations about the struggles, I see the tears that come from loss or frustrations.  I watch the anger and disappointment that accompanies the lack of control most of us have over the things that affect us most.  And yet these people give themselves the gift of exercise.  They take the time away from their stresses and frustrations and anger to focus on themselves.  

Train like an athlete because you are an athlete.  At what point do we finally lift enough weight, run fast enough or jump high enough to consider ourselves an athlete?  My simple answer: the point when you show up and push yourself to be a better version of the person that walked in the door.  Seriously, the fact that you show up and work hard, is enough.  The fact that you push yourself into the discomforts of both physical and mental places makes you enough.  And it is about time we start looking at the athlete in the mirror and realizing it is us looking back.